Lost all I had..

... and the search continues.
I think of myself as a traveller on the road of life. For me the road has no value. My own life has no value. Only two things matter. The people I meet on this road and the things I see.

And I move on. People forget me. But I remember them, if not today then tomorrow I WILL remember them. Always moving.

I dont wear boots but my heart does collect a lot of emotional dust. I meet someone on the way and I give them some of my load. Hope they can grow something out of it. Maybe my emotions will allow a few flowers to bloom in the desert.

My job is to remove pain from the world. For that I must keep moving. Must keep on seeking the pain. Seek it in others. Remove it and then move on.

Moving on is a must. No one wants to remember their pain. No one wants to remember those who helped them get rid of it. No one likes to be reminded that they too were once weak.

Thus I keep wandering. Taking pain and turning it into fertile earth. Keep on moving.. in an endless desert. Creating oasis as I move.

Abundance (A-C) VS Art (A-D).

WHO DO I LOVE?

WHICH PART DO I TAKE?

A hazy sunset at Noida 

My night @ the call center.

No I have not gone and spent a night at one of the many call centers that now litter the Indian countryside.
Last night I couldn't sleep so I picked up this book by Chetan Bhagat titled 'One night @ the call center'.
I managed to run through the book in one night. Sorry to diverge slightly at this point but one needs to appreciate the improvement in the quality (content as well as presentation) of books published in India. Thankfully the publisher kept the font size big throughout the book thus my tired eyes could continue reading for 4-5 hours continuously.

I put down this book with mixed emotions struggling for supremacy within me. The thing which I found odd about this book was its ending. I don't mean the last scene in the train. But the last scene at the signal. It sounded like something seen in a Hollywood rom-com (that's romantic comedy). The final ending, though, is a classical 180 degree twist ending and one can't complain about it.

The book itself is gripping and fast. More than that if you have the right mix of voyeurism and curiosity in you, the book will keep you entertained with a whole lot of predictable twists and turns through the story. Such things (don't want to spoil the twists) must surely happen to real people since we hear about them everyday through friends, family and the media.

Out of the six main characters (3 males, 3 females) I am sure everyone (especially those living in Delhi) will be able to pick a favourite one, the one who they feel closest to. Maybe because we have seen someone going through similar problems, someone we care(d) about? Or maybe we ourselves went through the same set of problems.

Initially I had some problems digesting the 'call from god' bit. But then again as the author suggests its better to take a risk and crash rather than sit in your comfort zone and just exist.
I compliment the author on taking this risk.

Finally the author raises a valid point about who is really holding the leash when it comes to Call Centers and BPOs. It is a messy and debatable topic but one thing is clear. Call centers are the modern digital sweat shops where you don't 'sweat' since it is centrally air-conditioned. You pay the price of a good nights rest and a meaningless existence leading only to a sum of money at the end of the month.

But maybe this view is not correct. Maybe people want the cocoon of a sum of money at the end of the month and see call center jobs as proper careers? Will need to talk to someone about this.

:)

UPDATE:
Have spoken to a friend of mine who works at a call center.
According to her around 20% of her co-workers think of a call center job as a long term career.
At the same time another friend of mine who has worked for a call center said working there made you feel as if "you were a dog tied to a post with a headset instead of a leash".

What is in a Ph.D.

Everytime people get to know that I am doing a Ph.D. they ask me what it is about.
I have to sugar-coat my replies when in reality I want to just hand them one of my published papers and say something like "thats what its about, if you understand it then please explain it to me also".

I think if anything Ph.D. teaches you patience. Because sometimes I feel Ph.D. is all about waiting (or learning to wait!).
Waiting for your papers to be accepted or rejected.
Waiting for your supervisor.
Waiting to get results.

Ph.D. is like meditation. One has to be cool and calm and realise that a Ph.D. will last for minimum three years.
The three years of introspection and being alone in your work does give you tremendous confidence. On good days I feel like an eagle soaring high above everyone else.

But on bad days its difficult even to get out of bed.
:)